how to mend a broken heart
Yiikes!!! I’ve never experienced anything related to a broken heart, perhaps a yearning heart. After reading a fellow blogger still haunted by that bitter concluded but sweet and cherished past, I’m thinking maybe I should give out some funny if not useful advice regarding fixing a broken heart. So, brace yourself. Here it goes.
- Remove all his/her pictures in your room or anywhere near you. You won’t forget them if you constantly have a reminder.
- And don’t forget also to include those things he/she gave to you and that would further include the things that the two of you shared and those that reminded you of him/her. If you have her panties or panties that the two of you shared using (if you enjoyed that kind of thing), burn it.
- Stop listening to romantic music, and love songs for a year. Some hamsters I know who listen to love songs develop some form of suicidal tendencies.
- Keep yourself busy. Thinking of work helps remove those extra baggages in the brain.
- Start dreaming of you and your crush or favorite artist, singer, actor, actress, model happy together. Imaginary boyfriend/girlfriends can help get rid of sobbing emotions. Since I’m trapped inside my terrarium, I keep on practicing this sort of thing. I love day dreaming, especially when Ji-Hyun of “My Sassy Girl” comes to mind.
- Join extra-curricular activities or club. New hobbies can remove old habits and thoughts that are related to your goddamn past. I nibble on salted sunflower seeds then store it inside my cheek pouch for a hobby.
- If possible, join highly strenuous activities and work-outs. It removes waste fats in the body that contribute to depression and converts it to muscles and a happier outlook of life. It also shakes off that clogging sorrow trapped in between your brain circulatory system. Martial art is highly recommended. While at it, imagine doing the “katas” (forms or martial art techniques) on your god forsaken boyfriend/girlfriend and his/her new partner. Whattahhh!!!
- Start flirting with the opposite sex. Pick those that are more of a problem rather than a boy/girlfriend material. They will start to annoy you and give you headaches instead of falling in love with them. This way those depressing memories will be replaced by a new problem. You can dump the problem flings later on without feeling guilty about it if you think you have moved on already.
- Talk to your friends all the time. Tell stupid stories. Spend your time being a clown and a complete nuisance. I have a friend who does that when his girlfriend left him. After a few months, he is dating a new one. Maybe its effective.
- If that heart is still broken after the above solutions, hmmm…, how about becoming a celibate priest or nun, or, perhaps, a Buddhist monk? Trying the ways of a devote yogi doing tantric chants and extra-ordinary feats through trance is also an option.
Tagged as: love, heart, broken, mend
2 Comments:
Becoming a Buddhist monk will never be my choice. I still haven't use my 'dagger' yet!
If I were broken hearted and can't fix it, I'll be either a kung fu fighting taoist or, perhaps, a shaolin monk.
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